The Breast Fairy

Ok, this is actually a childhood story that took place on our way up to Cape Cod one summer. My brother was like 5 so I was 13 and my sister was 12. I am estimating. Anyway, we’d been listening to a tape of Bill Cosby’s standup called “Those of you With or Without Children Will Understand.” Bill was telling the story about how his little girl was concerned about the fact that she didn’t have breasts yet as she was about to start middle school and some of her friends had already…ahem…bloomed in that area. So she was wondering when she would get hers. So Bill tells the story of the Breast Fairy who flies around from house to house and she has a bicycle pump, sometimes she pumps a little, sometimes she pumps a lot. My little brother turns to my sister and says.

“She must have had a hole in her pump when she got to you.”

I think we almost ran off the road.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/10023417839687501752 Snooty Primadona

    OMG! That’s funny. Sounds like the kind of thing my brother would have said. If I hadn’t boobs, lol.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/04512609340464356355 JokerOnMars

    lmao. Well, plump enhancement is available.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/09327327165971954735 Shannon

    that is stinkin’ hilarious!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/09231189382322458961 Missy

    Happy SITS feature day! Soak it up baby! I had no idea that Bill Cosby would discuss breasts, which makes it all the more hilarious! I hope she wasn’t scarred for life.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/03943450964172755972 Toni

    that is so funny!

  • http://www.mom2dbmk.com Smoochiefrog

    Great story! Ha!She totally missed me.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/07746896375826415145 Givinya De Elba

    Hilarious! Damn Breast Fairy gave it too much when she got to me. Bitch.

  • http://summersnook.com Summer

    ROFL!!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/14660401535856930165 KC

    Ha ha. Good story.Congrats on being the SITS featured blogger.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/13623440501234583451 trashalou

    I’m laughing on the outside for this one! Plus BIG love for any Bill Cosby, he is the soundtrack of my childhood.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/02315720415774254785 Debbie

    THAT IS HILARIOUS! That is quick witted for any little boy let alone a FIVE YEAR OLD. Classic!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/11724526923343865256 EmBee

    Little brothers can be such shits!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/15542473853342128094 Debbie

    Hilarious!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/14795302914247774677 Suzanne's Blog, Jane's Blog

    great story, love childhood memories.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/04097189273749523896 Angela

    Oh, breast fairy, why are you so selective?

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/16294737383070572992 Jennifer

    Oh too funny! Congrats on being featured on SITS!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/18341753113164178323 Lula!

    HUH-larious. Truly! And mad props to your family for listening to Bill Cosby…we have most of his comedy routines memorized. Even my girls have been known to walk around the house singing, “Dad is great…made us chocolate cake!”

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/17207240826243115784 Sherri

    Oh that Breast Fairy is just not fair!!!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/11027061380778030388 Rhea

    Oh, little brothers. Don’t you love em?! That’s a great comment.The breast fairy must have fallen sleep while pumping me up because I think I got someone’s extra bit…just sayin’.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/14403140121785234428 Z's Mom

    hahaaha….what a cute story! Makes me glad I don’t have a little brother…Hey, I think the Breast Fairy skipped me…… :(

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/13713705070301134783 Adiel

    What a great story! That is too funny! Aren’t little brothers the best?

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/06278630444931205359 Cristin

    Too funny!! I have 4 sisters who are ALL well endowed. I barely fill an A cup… the joke in our hose is that I got my father’s chest…

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/17109531002159599556 Karen

    Oh dear, I should have warned myself, by the title of the post, that taking a sip of coffee, while reading, would not be a good idea!At least I avoided spluttering over my computer screen, however, Sparky (one of my small dogs) who was sitting on my feet at the time, was not too impressed! :-)

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/04406755413501443756 Sunshine

    I love me some Bill Cosby!Why did the Breast Fairy have to wait until I had the babies to give me my boobies? I totally needed them when I was like oh, um…18! Now, I’m of the philosophy that less is more.Pretty funny, girlie!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/06723115517394978327 THE Stephanie

    Brothers…

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/13061586966925524808 Mrs. S

    That’s really funny. Reminds me of my mom. She used to say that God gave her two older sisters big helpings of boobs, then decided he’d given them too much so He didn’t give her (my mom) any. Then God felt bad about not giving her any, so he gave her younger sister a big helping.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/03907178224086726030 Jennifer P.

    SO are you saying that if I just hook myself up to the bicycle pump—there might be hope for me yet :) ?!…..Funny story!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/03899065934620506700 Karen

    So funny!My mom always told me to be happy with a C cup- she had DD- b/c I could wear sweaters better! Hmmm now I think she was just comforting me!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/10065962367181064516 Hairline Fracture

    Hahaha! I love that Bill Cosby story.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/05935072824189114873 Talisman

    HAHA! Classic.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/16056327117924455147 Mama Dawg

    Oh, man, I can’t believe I hadn’t read this yet! Classic!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/08123430890236503375 Feathering My Nest

    The Breast Fairy passed over my house. When they passed out boobs, I thought they said inner-tubes, and I’d take mine flat.Kathi

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/07635883243058872110 Mrs. R

    So good!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/04272841722936736948 Neurotically Yours:

    OMGOSH!! HILARIOUS!! Kids say the best things :) I think she had a hole in her pump when she stopped by my house, too!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/10780791486490274607 Maternal Mirth

    My breast fairy came in the form of $4000 worth of silicone… :)

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/18241915723936809627 Swirl Girl

    the breast fairy pump was stuck in the ‘on’ position for my sister, and when she got to me…well, let’s just say there are chickens with bigger breasts than mine!http://www.swirlgirlspearls.blogspot.com

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/07752808766555503042 Mamasphere

    Classic!I seemed to have escaped a lot of hassle by not having a brother!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/06782022114303206069 Deb

    Ah brothers! I have 4 myself (with nary a boyfriend in my teenage years). They do make you want to “pop” them upside the head.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/10399156539354549499 Jen

    Oh my goodness. To funny.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/04595099393803175375 Nicole

    Oh, that is so funny. I remember a kid telling me once I was so flat the walls were jealous MEAN!I’m gonna go get the bicycle pump right now :)

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/00885710131012274860 Scary Mommy

    I totally snorted. Glad I’m alone!!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/06131845183600329018 Gina

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!I had no idea that was how it worked and I am SO MAD because she had a hole in it when she got to me too.DADBURNITALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/02529859630615522678 angie

    HILARIOUS Story. I’m pretty sure that happened to me, too! Sigh. :)

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/05155540225515457507 Alaina

    Yeah SITS! I can say “I knew you when!” :-) Awesome.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/13772208953959596713 insane mama

    Maybe I stole your air… SorryHow are you handling all the comments and love?

  • http://mothersmilkblog.com MomMega

    Oh, I feel your sister’s pain…

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/16919079134282687094 Adrienne

    Hahaha, that’s so funny! Bill Cosby is sorta funny on average! :D Your poor sister. hahaha. http://scrappin-a-rose.blogspot.com/

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/00205651595390888737 Marla

    good stuff, she must have gotten stuck and my house for the whole night

  • http://lfamily5.wordpress.com/ lfamily5

    HaHaHa…that is so funny! Great story!visiting via sits

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/05305850648928447302 Danielle

    This is FUNNY! Brothers can be so awful sometimes!!!Happy SITS Day!!!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/07883134785413980728 Laurel

    The little guy was FIVE?! Hilarious.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/13892152223184030151 Karen

    So funny! I have two younger sisters and when my youngest sister finally “bloomed” we were talking about how well (or not well)-endowed we all were. I think she put it best when she said I had mosquito bites, my middle sister had baseballs and she ended up with watermelons. We laugh about that to this day!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/17071661413559588422 Lisa

    So funny. Ah, brotherly love.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/11556451375792958743 Mama's Losin' It

    I had one of those brothers too. Did you slap him!?!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/04240942361330902385 AFRo

    Shame on him!!! That’s pretty funny though.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/06193560597039721606 Jenni

    This topic is always funny to me because I have been on both ends of the spectrum. . .I just went the wrong direction!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/03516546337996538661 Pam Hawk

    Oh LOL!I don’t think that fairy had a problem with me the first time around but I could use a little refill. I seem to have a slow leak.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/09818169243613602266 Gina

    I was the president of the Itty Bitty Titty Committee until 10th grade! I thought she forgot where I lived.Great post. It made me snort- I’m glad I’m alone.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/01887360369268725280 Jill

    THat’s too funny! Must have happened with me, too!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/04952741911671249913 Caroline

    That is so funny! Sorry I didn’t give you comment love yesterday when you were featured. Its almost a full time job keeping up with all these blogs, checking in and then doing my own posts. We should get paid!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/03040475544263267089 Judy Haley

    ha! I think I would have run off the road too.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/17899156199746163443 swile67

    that is a ROTFL story!!! can I ask if the breast fairie’s pump got fixed and she came back to fill you again?!!!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/07803503583347758969 Michelle

    Ohhh your poor sister! If it makes her feel better lo these many years later, my gram used to refer to my mom’s breasts as mosquito bites. Ouch!

  • http://www.halfpastkissintime.com Half-Past Kissin' Time

    Awww. Leave it to a brother to make a comment like that! :(

  • http://notsosahm.wordpress.com Vicki

    Oh, that’s hilarious!! I love that story! BTW, I do believe that she came by and siphoned the air out of mine.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/10846463631273691864 WheresMyAngels

    That is way too funny!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/13516151350022189691 Alex the Girl

    Well, she over inflated mine.